How Some Children Played At Slaughtering Transcript
Micah (Knob Twister): 0:07
Welcome to Tales of Bedlam. I'm your host. I forgot who you were.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 0:14
Oh my god, this is going well already. I am he who setteth his posterior upon the sofas.
Mr. Death Hades: 0:23
And I'm death.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 0:25
Oh lord, sit down death. Oh lord, sit down death. That's right. No reaping for the next hour and a half, please.
Micah (Knob Twister): 0:33
We have a very special guest with us today, Mr Death Hades you just read your lines and behave yourself.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 0:40
Don't kill anything.
Mr. Death Hades: 0:42
I'm here for a fantastic time.
Micah (Knob Twister): 0:47
Jeez. Today's tale is our second one of our spectacular, spooktacular Halloween specials for October.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 1:01
That was punny.
Micah (Knob Twister): 1:03
Ed Death. Would you introduce this story, oh Lord.
Mr. Death Hades: 1:07
How some children played at slaughtering.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 1:12
I'm sure that gives you all kinds of pleasure too, doesn't it? Put your sickle down.
Micah (Knob Twister): 1:16
Thank you. Death, that is the title. This tale encompasses two stories, that's right. Two stories with different endings. It's a two stories, that's right. Two stories with different endings. It's a twofer. This originally was in the Brothers Grimm's original collection from 1812, but the brothers decided to withdraw this tale because it may not be appropriate reading for children.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 1:42
But it's fine to listen to. Just don't let them read it.
Mr. Death Hades: 1:46
It's depressing.
Micah (Knob Twister): 1:49
We'll let you be the judge.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 1:52
What the heck this is so bad they took it out of their collection.
Micah (Knob Twister): 1:56
Yes, wow, so without further ado, how Some Children Played at Slaughtering Story 1.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 2:06
This just starts out gruesome Just the title's gruesome Alright in a story named Franeker, located in West Friesland, which is apparently in the Netherlands, in the northern part of the country. I've been there, of course you have.
Mr. Death Hades: 2:26
People die there, we know, I'm quite often there because it's so cold. Sit down and lonely.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 2:36
You can interrupt me the whole time. I tell you what dude you and me are going to have some words Now. You made me lose my place. Some young boys Wow, Some young boys and girls between the ages of five and six that's very specific happened to be playing with one another. They were just accidentally whoops.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 3:00
I just want to point out the equality here there were boys and girls yes, playing together and never mind that they were all white and blonde haired, but that's probably why they took it out of their edition, because they were girly quality. They chose one boy to play a butcher, another boy was to play the cook I can just see where this is going already. This isn't okay. And the third boy was to be the pig.
Micah (Knob Twister): 3:31
Oh boy.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 3:33
Death sit down.
Mr. Death Hades: 3:35
White children squeal when they die. I knew it.
Micah (Knob Twister): 3:40
That's not okay, I can see where this is going. For sure it says playing, but I'm a little worried so I guess I will continue with the story. Then they chose one girl to be a cook and another girl, her assistant. And there goes your equality, I was just gonna say, and the equality went out the door. The assistant was to catch the blood of the pig in a little bowl so they could make sausages. Man, don't people eat anything, blood sausage, so gross. As agreed, the butcher now fell upon the little boy playing the pig. Oh, threw him to the ground and slit his throat wide open with a knife, holy crap. Wow, the assistant cook caught the blood in her little bowl wide open with a knife, holy crap.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 4:36
Wow, the assistant cook caught the blood in her little bowl.
Micah (Knob Twister): 4:37
This is some serious plan going on. Is this like a?
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 4:40
Fisher-Price bowl, I don't know, one of those little pink like teacup, tea set.
Micah (Knob Twister): 4:46
It obviously wasn't a Fisher-Price knife, because I've tried. You can't stab your brother with that.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 4:54
Weird, so they just got right into it.
Micah (Knob Twister): 4:57
I guess so.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 5:02
They just held this kid down, slit his throat and collected his blood. All right, I'm not okay with this. A councilman was walking nearby and saw this wretched act. Hmm, he immediately took the butcher with him and led him into the house of the mayor, who instantly summoned the entire council. Oh, boy. Wow.
Micah (Knob Twister): 5:23
How do you handle this?
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 5:25
Someone needs some serious therapy Death.
Micah (Knob Twister): 5:29
do you have any like advice in this situation? Oh, you would.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 5:33
Why.
Micah (Knob Twister): 5:37
Hmm.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 5:37
Wow, he's quiet for once. He's just over there slobbering on himself.
Micah (Knob Twister): 5:42
Um no, it looks like he's sharpening his scythe.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 5:47
Oh stop, I told you to put that down. Just keep sharpening and don't move. They deliberated about the incident and did not know what they should do to the boy, for they realized it had been part of a children's game. Well, be that as it may, not okay?
Micah (Knob Twister): 6:08
One of the councilmen, an old, wise man, advised the chief judge to take a beautiful red apple in one hand and a gold coin in the other. Okay, then he was to call the boy and stretch out his hand to him. If the boy took the apple, he was to be set free. If he took the the apple, he was to be set free. If he took the gold coin, he was to be killed.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 6:35
What.
Mr. Death Hades: 6:36
Take the coin. Yes, too, take the coin. What? That's exactly what I would have done, oh.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 6:48
Don't lie oh boy Death.
Micah (Knob Twister): 6:53
would you finish?
Mr. Death Hades: 6:55
the story for us. The judge took the wise man's advice and the boy grabbed the apple with a laugh oh you're creepy. Thus he was set free without any punishment.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 7:12
Well, I just don't like that at all. That's not how that's supposed to go.
Micah (Knob Twister): 7:18
Maybe that's why they took this story out. I think after the first instant where kids actually slid another kid's throat open, they were like maybe we should remove this from our collection of stories, yeah, and then he gets away with it.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 7:35
That's exactly what I'm getting at.
Micah (Knob Twister): 7:39
They don't learn any lesson.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 7:41
There's no lesson to be had here, other than you get a nice apple if you kill your friend and drain his blood in a tea cup Beautiful red apple.
Micah (Knob Twister): 7:51
There's a different ending, yes, well, if you thought that Was gruesome, the second story is much, much worse.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 8:02
And these are related.
Mr. Death Hades: 8:04
Everyone dies.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 8:06
Oh, your kind of story then. Jeez, which were kind of ticked off.
Micah (Knob Twister): 8:10
The first one Nobody died Except for the poor little pig, poor little pig did so story, two pig did so story two.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 8:27
There once was a father who slaughtered a pig and his children saw that. Well, that happens you gotta get bacon somewhere. Yep, in the afternoon, when they began playing, one child said the other you be the little pig and I'll be the butcher. That'll be fun. Yeah, I bet it will. He then took a shiny knife and slit his little brother's throat.
Micah (Knob Twister): 8:48
Oh, my gosh, what the flip flop. It's even worse it was his brother. The mother was upstairs in a room bathing another child, and when she heard the cries of her son, she immediately ran downstairs. Upon seeing what had happened, she took the knife out of her son's throat and was so enraged that she stabbed the heart of the other boy who had been playing the butcher. What is?
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 9:18
going on what's going?
Micah (Knob Twister): 9:24
on in the Netherlands, I don't know man. This is, this is, this is.
Mr. Death Hades: 9:27
Yeah, murder.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 9:32
He slit his brother's throat so the mom's ticked off. She grabs the knife, stabs him in the heart In her rage, she kills her other son after pulling the knife from his throat and she leaves the other one upstairs in the bath to drown.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 9:47
Apparently what, oh my gosh, I didn't even. I didn't mean to spoil it. But then she quickly ran back to the room to tend her child in the bathtub, but while she was gone he had drowned in the tub. Holy crap, Too late, Too late. Now, the woman became so frightened and desperate that she did not allow the neighbors to comfort her and finally hung herself.
Micah (Knob Twister): 10:15
Could we have Don't ever live in this house.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 10:17
Six people die in the matter of four sentences, please.
Micah (Knob Twister): 10:20
Death. Can you finish this story for me, Jeez?
Mr. Death Hades: 10:23
I can't do it I just can't. When her husband came back from the fields and saw everything, he became so despondent that he too died soon thereafter.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 10:38
Yeah, well, now I see why you're sitting in on this story, you big idiot, jeez. Hope you're happy now.
Mr. Death Hades: 10:46
A good death can and should mean different things to different people like you, Dustin.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 10:57
Well, that was uh. Well, you know at least there was.
Micah (Knob Twister): 11:00
Oh my Goodness.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 11:03
It was all in the course of an afternoon.
Micah (Knob Twister): 11:05
There was no goodness in that story.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 11:07
I can see how they.
Micah (Knob Twister): 11:09
That one was just I'm wondering if they got some complaints. It wasn't just like oh hey, maybe we should take this one out. They probably got complaints.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 11:19
They had a PTA meeting. We can't have this in our children's books. You have to take one out. They probably got complaints.
Micah (Knob Twister): 11:25
They had a PTA meeting. We can't have this in our children's books. You have to take it out, century PTA meeting, and burn it please, and you know how those kind of meetings usually end up With somebody strung up on a rope, tied to a burning cross, upside down, or drowned. Wow.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 11:39
Well, I don't think you could put any more gruesomeness into 12 lines of a story. If you tried, I've seen worse.
Mr. Death Hades: 11:48
Well, you've done worse.
Micah (Knob Twister): 11:55
Whole cities have cowered before me Always a pleasure to have you here, Mr Death Hades. Yeah, come back anytime If you liked this second of our installation of five tales for October of spooktacular spooklariousness. That made no sense. It was gruesome. If this tale grossed you out and got you in the mood for a spooky Halloween, tell your friends, family, be our sounding board, let people know about us, direct them to any kind of podcast playing app and have them subscribe to our show. There's three more for this month. Good night.
Mr. Death Hades: 12:43
Bye, I'll be seeing you soon.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 12:56
How come we didn't find that one last year. That was gruesome.
Micah (Knob Twister): 13:00
I did a lot of looking because it's not in the book that I have.
Dustin (Sofa Sitter): 13:05
Oh, it's not in the book because they removed it. Wow well, at least they didn't make the blood sausage and then eat it in the first one you think that one's bad Wait till this next one Great?
Mr. Death Hades: 13:27
I'll make you squeal like a pig.