Doctor Know-all Transcript

Micah (Knob Twister)Host00:04

Welcome to Tales of Bedlam. This is a fairy tale audio comedy. It's comedy. I'm your host, micah Okie dokie, and that would be our other host. Today we're doing another Brother Grimm fairy tale called Dr.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host00:20

Know-All Jacob and Wilhelm, grimm, the Brothers Grimm, the Grimm Brothers.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host00:26

Without further ado, dustin Dr Know-All.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host00:32

Once upon a time that's my favorite beginning. It's a good entry there was a poor peasant by the name of Crabb who drove two oxen with a load of wood into a town where he sold it to a doctor for two thalers and, as we all know at this point, thalers were money. Yes, some kind of money. Okay, it was money If you listen to any of our Money money, money, money, money, money.

00:58

Dustin's been drinking the whiskey. He received his money hey, I just said that Just as the doctor was sitting down to eat. When the peasant saw how well the doctor ate and drank, his heart took a longing for the same things and he decided that he would like to have been a doctor. He stood there for a little while and then asked if he too could not become a doctor.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host01:21

Well, certainly said the doctor In no time at all.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host01:27

What do I have to do? Asked the peasant.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host01:30

First of all buy yourself an ABC book. What yes? So it says an ABC book. Maybe that's like a grammar book, huh, in the what. What is this? The 1400s A-B-C-D-E-F-G.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host01:49

Yeah, they had the alphabet back then.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host01:51

First of all, buy yourself an ABC book.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host01:55

Mm-hmm.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host01:56

One that has a picture of a cock up front. Mm-hmm, so that's a porno, oh jeez. Second, sell your wagon and your two oxen and buy yourself some clothing and other things that doctors use Just random things Like a stethoscope. Leeches and that little doohiggy that you hit their knees with A reflex hammer. That's it. See, you're on your way to being a doctor yeah, this was.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host02:27

This was more like leeches and, uh, scalpels.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host02:30

Yeah, dirty bone saws third, have yourself a sign painted with the words I am doctor, know all I'm, so getting the sign and nail it above the door to your house.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host02:46

I am so getting this sign. I am so getting this sign. The peasant did everything he was told to do after he had doctored a little, but not very much. That was the best line ever. Some money was stolen from a guest Stolen from what I'm starting over. Some money was stolen from a great and wealthy nobleman. Someone told him about dr noel who lived in such and such a village, such. We just had a such and such in village yes, that's where that bar is. That has the the serial killer and keeper Mother.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host03:22

I mean the serial killer, man and wife.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host03:26

Yeah, Weird, it's all tying together. Finally, and who must know where the money had gone. So the gnomeman had his carriage hitched up, rode out to the village and asked him if he were Dr Knowall.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host03:40

Yes, that I am, but I'm a little confused. Doesn't he need, like a detective, not a doctor, it's Dr Know-All.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host03:51

Okay, I don't know, man, I didn't write the story, I just read it.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host03:54

Then you must come with me and recover my stolen money.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host03:58

Yes, but my wife.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host03:59

Greta must come along too. The nobleman agreed and had them take their places in his carriage. They rode away together. They arrived at the nobleman's court just at mealtime and the nobleman invited him to eat. That was so nice of him.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host04:15

Yes, but include my wife Greta.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host04:20

He always wants her included.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host04:21

Yeah he replied, and the two of them sat down behind the table. When the first servant brought out a platter of fine food, the peasant nudged his wife and said Greta, that's the first one, Meaning the meal's first course.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host04:37

Wow, did he learn that from his ABC book? His ABC book and all?

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host04:40

his various doctor things. However, the servant learn that from his ABC book, his ABC book and all his various doctor things.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host04:44

However, the servant thought that he meant that's the first thief and because that is indeed what he was, he took fright and outside he said to his comrades the doctor knows.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host05:02

Why did they say everything. I didn't write the story once again.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host05:06

It's going to go badly for us. He said that I'm the first one.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host05:12

Guilty conscience much. The second one did not want to go inside at all, but finally he had to, and when he entered, the peasant nudged his wife and said Greta, that's the second one. This servant took pride as well and went outside. It did not go any better for the third one. Once again, the peasant said Greta, that's the third one. The fourth one brought in a covered platter and the nobleman told the doctor that he should demonstrate his art by guessing what it contained.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host05:46

Shockingly enough it was crabs.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host05:50

The peasant looked at the platter and, seeing no way out of his dilemma, he said to himself oh poor crab.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host05:58

Hearing this, the nobleman called out If he knows that, then he must know who has the money as well. True that the servant grew very fearful and motioned to the doctor to go outside there. All four of them confessed to him that they had stolen the money. Nicely done, dr Nowell. They offered to give it all to him and a handsome sum in addition, if he would not turn them in, otherwise they would all hang. They showed him where the money was hidden. The doctor was satisfied with this and he went back inside and sat down again at the table and ate some crabs. I love crabs.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host06:41

I love to eat crabs.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host06:43

Anyway.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host06:44

My lord. He said now I will look in my book to see where the money is hidden In his ABC book, in his ABC book. Said now I will look in my book to see where the money is hidden in his abz book with the cock on front you're you're ruining it.

07:00

However, the fifth servant climbed into the stove in order to hear if the doctor knew anything else. The doctor leafed back and forth in his book looking for the picture of the cock. You stop Not finding it. He said I know that you are in there.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host07:23

Come on out, help me find this cock.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host07:26

I can't find a picture of my cock.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host07:28

The man in the stove thought that the doctor was talking to him and, terrified, he jumped out saying the man knows everything. Then the doctor know-all showed the nobleman where the money was, but he did not tell who had stolen it. Thus he received a large reward from each side and became a famous man. What a lovely story. And this is the beginnings of.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host07:58

Sherlock Holmes. That's right, dr Newell.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host08:04

Of course he changed his name, but I can't find my rooster. I know you're in there somewhere.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host08:11

Come on up.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host08:13

Why was he looking for that picture anyway? Because he was a dunce. Well, yes, that was a lovely interesting story of how the fool fooled everybody. Oh, I might use that. You need to get me an ABC book book, so that I too can know all you have to get the one with the right picture on it. That's right, uh, and I need a sign.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host08:41

I'm getting a sign if we ever going over my door build our studio.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host08:45

We should put a sign like that on the doctor know all, yep.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host08:50

I'm getting one. I'm going to get one that attaches to my hat and just hangs over my head A neon one, dr No-Wall.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host08:55

It flashes Dr No-Wall. Well, how about I just make it into one of our t-shirts?

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host09:00

Oh, that would be perfect. A Dr.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host09:03

No-Wall shirt. Yep, tales of Bedlam. Dr Knowall, you got to put a big chicken on it. No, an ABC book with a rooster on the front. I'm buying one. Check it out If you want to purchase any of our swag and become a walking billboard for us. You can have that pleasure granted to you by just going to our website at TalesOfBedlamcom. Click on the button in the upper right-hand corner that says Swag. Button that says Swag.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host09:37

Order a t-shirt. They're cool. I have one.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host09:39

Yeah, order one. They do cost money. Well, yeah, whatever. Wow, I just lost it here for a minute. The t-shirts cost money. Yes, they do. We can't ship them out for free. How many Thalers? Not a lot, especially if you catch them in a sale. Anyways, check us out TalesOfBethlehemcom, click on that swag or go to this episode, dr Know-All, and leave us a comment. Let us know if you'd like a Dr Know-All shirt yes.

10:10

If we get a comment or two about it, I will spend the time to make up some art for it. Sweet Good night, bye.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host10:25

He couldn't find his cock. I know you're in there.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host10:31

Granted Gr there, grab it, grab it. Come help me find this. I read seven or eight stories.

Dustin (Sofa Sitter)Host10:39

before I hit that one I was like oh my God.

Micah (Knob Twister)Host10:42

I'm going to make Mike say cock again.